How to: fail your online class when you’re an A student

I knew I hated online classes, and yet I signed up for one this semester. My worst in person class is still a thousand times better than the most interesting online class.

I care infinitely less when nobody gets to see my face and judge my performance. Half the time I forget about it. And you know what else? Forced discussion offends me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a talker, I love discussion and debate. I do not love reading and responding to people whose opinions are about as developed as an infants understanding of social stratification: none. None developed.

It’s like the equivalent of inviting in the thinking demonstrated in the YouTube comments section. Just, why? There’s a reason those kids don’t talk in class, and it’s because they don’t have shit to say. You know why? Cos they give no fucks about the class! That’s part of the reason they’re taking it on-fucking-line, dude!

The bummer is it’s actually an interesting class and I’d be interested in the topic in a classroom setting. I’m just 89% procrastinator and forget about it until the day all the work is due. I bomb the quizzes. My only redeeming grace is that I’m super analytical and great at expressing myself with words [not taking into account my fondness for cursing].

Also, I feel like the professor is just as irresponsible, too. I have ten or twelve ungraded assignments. What’s that about? This week he wanted us to watch a video, but uploaded a file that isn’t accessible from macs, so I’d have to buy it to watch it [it’s too obscure to stream]. Fuck that shit. I already had to pay a fucking online class fee when I’m not even using school resources to participate and the professor is hardly ever accessible.

Bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit.

End rant.

[Note: Reasonable me takes responsibility for my lack of work receiving an appropriate grade and recognizes I could be more on top of it throughout the week so I didn’t feel overwhelmed by the deadline. Also I feel like throwing up, my back feels like a collapsed building, I have a migraine, and I’m painfully aware of what it is to be female. I’m sorry to all my male friends. You are so kind. I love the shit out of you. #moodswings]

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