What’s up wordpress? Why no milestone badge? I know it exists, I’ve seen others post a screen shot. Anyways, I hit 200 followers, that’s super awesome. I’m glad for a lot of the feedback I’ve been getting on various pieces. Today I received awards for Mechanical Love and town kendall. I had asked two of my professors to present me and they were both really kind and hyped up my writing to the point I wasn’t sure I could deliver. One said to get my autograph. My best friend and I were dying laughing. It’s odd to have someone say things like that about you, although it would be pretty cool if someone asked me for it.
The person who won the “My Best Friend” essay contest was there. She did a reading. I made a face at the end, I thought it was so poorly written, technically and from a storytelling perspective. There’s a rule, show don’t tell, and all it does is tell, but not even in a way that’s conveying any deeper meaning. I’m bitter. I wanted to read the essays that beat Yarn Squid and judge them, and now I have, and I still think mine’s better. I should really let go of this whole competitive thing, it’s making me hate strangers.
My application is still at the step before decision. I don’t have as much anxiety, but I’m still super uncomfortable. I don’t feel good about how much time I spend complaining lately. I’m afraid I’m annoying. I mean shit, I’m annoyed. My annoyed face gives me a headache, something about the scrunching and obsession over current grievances. Not that I don’t deserve to be hurt or unhappy or whatever I am in each moment, I’m just not being as responsible about dealing with it as I can be. I really want to go to the gym and eat salad.